This is BP in Jerusalem in August(2006).
Yes, during the war.
He is ordering an Hawaiian Pizza, without much luck it appears. He had been looking for a BLT sandwich since his arrival after having heard that nothing beats an Israeli tomato. Poor, poor BP, he is so naive sometimes, Innit?
He tells me he was 'Spotting' for the Lebanese Hizballah Katyusha rocket-men. I don't believe it though.
He is a tad thinner now and broader in the shoulder and narrow at the hip, but he can always be recognised by that fucking US Civil War, Southern Soldier reenactment hat of his. The cunt sleeps with it I reckon. One will never know as all who are unlucky enough to have the unfortunate 'pleasure' of a nocturnal magical mystery tour with him emerge, if they emerge at all, in dire straits requiring years of institutional care, palliative in most cases.
It is said to be 'barbed' I am told.
He is about to embark on a three city tour in the United States ostensibly to deflower all manner of naïve Yankee women. He tells me he will be engaging in 'Secret Agent Man' activities with the United Network Command for Law Enforcement. Fighting the evil forces of the Technological Hierarchy for the Removal of Undesirables and the Subjugation of Humanity organisation - cloak and dagger!
Right! He will have his copy of "The Lesser Known Plays of George Bernard Shaw" and a case of Monistat under his arm.
Somebody kill the fucker!
Walther PPK owners please take note. It is important to use this weapon as it was/is James Bond's gun. The irony would be so rich.
Vagina Dentata - plotting a coup!